Showing posts with label body image. Show all posts
Showing posts with label body image. Show all posts

Tuesday, February 3, 2015

The Houston Marathon!

It has been sixteen days since I have completed my first marathon, the Houston Chevron Marathon. When I first signed up for the marathon I had this idea that I was going to train to qualify for the Boston Marathon; however, shortly after starting graduate school I realized that I had over-committed myself and needed to readjust my goal for the race. I decided that instead of aiming to run under 3:30 I would aim to run the marathon in 4:00 or under. As the semester picked up speed and training grew more time consuming I began to question if I could do both training and school successfully. To top it off I added a week-long vacation in the middle of the semester and to visit my best friend in Panama where training took a backseat to some amazing once in a lifetime adventures!

Fast forward to race day…

As I reached downtown Houston with my dad at 5:45 AM my nerves started growing uncontrollably. I had been reciting the mantra to just finish and not hurt myself for days now, and I was praying it would come true. After walking around the corrals and talking to my dad about whatever came to mind to distract myself from the self-doubt that was beginning to seep into my mind, it was time to get in Corral A and start warming up and stretching. Luckily my dad stood on the other side of the fence and offered to hold my things for me and kept me calm until it was time for the race to start.
Leading up to the gun going off there is music booming through downtown as the sun is just starting to rise, the national anthem is sung, and thousands of runners push themselves forward slowly to the start line. All the anticipation from months of grueling training are bubbling up the surface as we all wait for our turn to cross the line and to begin our 26.2 mile journey.

Once I had crossed the line and was actually able to run I was soon joined by a middle aged man (I wish I remembered his bib number), but him and I were running at the same pace so he decided to stick with me and my GPS watch for the first few miles of the race. However, I lost him after a quick trip to the port-a-potty. The miles were passing quickly and I was running faster than I anticipated which made me extremely nervous because I still had such a long way to go.

Mile 5: My dad met me and took my arm sleeves from me and got scolded by a volunteer about being close to the runners and the course…

Mile 6: My mom missed me, so she called me. I can now say I talked on the phone while running a marathon. I also was able to text people back using Siri; technology has come so far!

Mile 10: My parents met me again (running a marathon really is a team effort). They were full of encouragement and surprise at my pace, but they also had some of my nutrition and a much needed hat! At this point in the race I was feeling great! There was no pain, my nerves had finally subsided, and I was barely even breaking a sweat.

Mile 13.1: I passed the halfway mark only two minutes slower than I raced the half last year!!

Mile 16. I hit the wall and I hit it hard. At this point my knee started killing me; it was the same pain that I had experienced last year in the half marathon which was excruciating and made me take a step back from running for a few months to allow it to heal. I panicked. I didn't want to hurt myself; I had promised my parents I wouldn't do that this year, but I had also come so far…16 miles so I didn't want to give up. I decided my best option was to stop and stretch and walk it off…start jogging and walk until I could get to my parents.

Mile 17: Hobbling to the left side of the course I met with my parents who were all full of smiles, and I was a complete Negative Nelly at this point because my knee was hurting so bad. I begged them for medicine which they didn't have with them at the moment…that was a crushing moment. But I continued to walk jog my way towards the next mile marker.

Mile 18: Miracles do happen!! My dad drove past me on the course, stopped the car and stuck his hand out of the window with three or four magical little blue pills. Pain medicine!! Eagerly I tried to take the medicine with no water while running…this doesn't work due to dehydration. So I take care to hold the moist medicine in my hand til the next water stop.

Mile 19: Water. There was my mom holding a water bottle so I could take my medicine as soon as possible. I can do this…once the medicine kicks in!
At around this point I am getting a flood of encouraging texts from friends and family. All of which Siri reads to me in a monotone voice and she also reads out the emoticons (queue frowny face with furrowed brow and fish with puckered lips). This amuses me until I realize I am no longer experiencing the dreadful knee pain. Hooray!! The miles begin to pass rather quickly at this point. I am getting so close to finishing!

Mile 23: I see a guy stretching on the side of the road and when I glance back at him I realize that I know him. It was my old roommate Joe!! So of course I had to stop and take a selfie with him.

Mile 24: I passed Raymond Cooper, one of my many bosses, on the sidelines! He
was certainly my biggest fan during that stretch along Allen Parkway (the land of hills…)

Mile 26.2: My watch beeps that I have run my first marathon….but I haven’t crossed the finish line yet? Such a let down


Mile 26.2 (for real): As I approached the finish line I turned off my music and listened to the music being played throughout downtown and the broadcasts being announced as runner crossed the finish line. When I crossed I was completely overwhelmed by the purest sense of happiness. I had just run a marathon. I had done it on my own. I had trained for it on my own. This personal victory was all mine at 4:08:53! 

Friday, September 5, 2014

Battle Scars



Brittle bones peeking through thin skin.
Blue veins, visible just under the surface
Of the cracked, dull membrane,
Pump life to and from a hateful heart
Spreading self-loathing deeper into every cell.

A lifestyle meticulously planned.
Every meal portioned, downsized.
Workouts designed to break the body
Yet build mental fortitude with each
Jerky click of the second hand.

A smile parts the lips when the scale
Rewards sacrifices with shredded pounds.

They diagnose this as a mental disease,
But really this is war. 






Saturday, August 2, 2014

Orient Bay/Baie Oriental, St. Martin/St. Maarten

On my first full day in St. Martin we drove around the coast on the French side of the island sampling French-Caribbean cuisine, taking in the breathtaking views, and stopping by various beaches checking out the beautiful water. We ended up settling at Orient Bay…this was the first nude beach I have ever been to! There were some topless girls but I personally didn’t happen upon anyone in the nude. However, I immediately became very aware of the fact that I was in my (sexy) one piece, and I looked like a nun compared to others on the beach!! Experiencing this atmosphere for the first time was very eye opening for me for very different reasons. The nudity didn’t bother me; instead I actually realized that there should be no shame in covering up or uncovering your body. As a runner I have always been very aware of my body and the type of shape I am in, and I am generally very hard on myself. Of course I want to look good, but I like to feel like I’m in good running shape because that is when I feel powerful as a woman , like I can take on the world and I am unstoppable! At this beach I saw women of all shapes and sizes walking around with pride about who they are and what they look like which in turn made them all exceedingly beautiful, and you don’t see that as often in the United States as you do in other countries. Why is that?

So along with the beautiful people Orient Bay or Baie Oriental was equally as beautiful. The two mile stretch of beach has white sand like sugar and turquoise water which waves are perfectly suited for body surfing, leisure swimming past the break, and snorkeling further out on the reef. Orient Bay is nestled at the bottom of multiple mountain peaks while Caye Verte, Ilet de Pinel, and Ile Tintamarre pop out of the Atlantic on the horizon.  There was lot’s going on at the beach with parasailing, jet skis, and a random man jumping rope vigorously at the water’s edge in a speedo. At Club Orient the cabana boys brought us mojitos, cigars, and a cappuccino for when I needed my caffeine fix while we lounged around reading and tanning. The day in essence was perfect much like the island.  


 
My brother and I walked to this little unnamed island from the mainland near Caye Chateau. 

The view from Club Orient at Baie Oriental